• We should just get rid of the word and say gay woman instead

    Or how ‘bout this radical idea - we should let lesbians decide what word to call themselves? It’s awfully odd to decide to redefine a group of people without getting that group’s input on the matter.

    • Dragon Rider (drag)
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      227 days ago

      https://www.womensrepublic.net/the-demonization-of-the-word-lesbian/

      It has come to my attention that many homosexual women— myself included— struggle to identify with the label “lesbian” and prefer the all-encompassing terms “queer” or “gay.” As I reflect on my own coming-out experience, I recall an instant desire to distance myself from the word entirely

      Numerous factors, such as false media representation, negative stereotypes, and fetishization, have resulted in the rejection of the term lesbian by today’s queer women. So, I pose the question: with such a tainted image of the lesbian persona, is the word worth saving and reclaiming? As the modern queer women reject their pre-determined submissive gender roles, is it time for a new term to take the stage?

      https://medium.com/@viridiangrail/why-i-dont-identify-as-a-lesbian-anymore-26d673561e62

      These days, the word lesbian is a weapon, for TERFs and biphobes and exclusionists of all stripes. And what was I defending it for, in the first place? So I could go on using a different word for feminine gayness because femininity is so different from other gender presentations?

      I don’t use the word anymore because I’m a good deal convinced that the bigots may as well have it. It never brought the lot of us any actual good in My lifetime. Maybe one day, “lesbian” will mean a transphobic gay woman. And the rest of us “sapphics”, if you must put a specific label on it, will just be accepted as normal-ass gay people, the same as gay people of any gender identity.

      • Thank you for including these perspectives. This is the kind of context that puts the big picture together.

        I apologize for coming off rude. It’s not easy to tell online which perspective a person is arguing from, or if they are arguing in good faith. I appreciate that you provided additional information and viewpoints from other people. It gives me something new to think about.