The name of that hack? Java Script
And then 19 years later he became Mozilla CEO but people called him out for his anti-LGBT activism so he resigned and started the Chrome reskin crypto browser Brave instead
I hate it so much
Love to watch the entire internet shit itself because someone deprecated
is-even.json npm
Just going to leave this here for the other old heads:
So cozy. Never knew what adventure you would find while that animation played and your tiny dial-up modem struggled away.
dae remember watching homestarrunner on netscape with their cousin who had a computer
Yessssss
When nodejs became a thing and everyone started yapping about mongodb and their magical non blocking event loop language I felt like I had died and gone to hell. The fact that almost every single developer i then would interact with trying to convince me that anything that wasn’t nodejs could only handle 1 request at a time sent me over the edge. Then everyone started calling themselves a full stack developer and thinking their stupid little crud wank app was gonna be the next google so it absolutely must be written in nodejs. Npm toolchain still the absolute worst ive ever used and almost every setup used nodegyp which when forced to work on windows made me rather be destitute than install visual studio just for the build tools to not work and be left staring at meaningless npm errors. I dont think ive ever successfully got it to build on windows once in the last 10 years ive had to use this shit. Thank the lord for docker, oh wait my organisation doesnt let me use docker
Snorting a line of react native every morning i love having my ui dependent on some javascript translation layer wowie thanks facebook for your resource destroying memory leaking garbage shit that somehow became industry standard everywhere
ahhh i love a good rant. even though i don’t understand most of these words I got so angry for you
i met an engineer at FB and she reported that FB doesn’t even use very much react native for their own apps lul
anything that wasn’t nodejs could only handle 1 request at a time
that’s technically still true about most of nodejs’s direct competitors, even today. it ends up being hugely faster (per CPU) if most of your request is waiting on the database/filesystem/etc. It’s not faster if each request needs to hog the CPU, which is uncommon for what people normally use nodejs for. golang is probably the only mainstream competitor that is likely to do a better job at this one specific task. Everything else either has half-assed or non-existent support for async IO (python, php, ruby) or is very clearly not a direct competitor to nodejs (e.g. rust, zig, c) or I refuse to acknowledge it exists for lovecraftian reasons (Java).
I refuse to acknowledge it exists for lovecraftian reasons (Java).
The JVM is a pathway to abilities that many would consider… Unnatural. And quite honestly, the language has gotten less terrible over the past several years. The problem is that a good chunk of the software out there in the corpo world is still stuck on Java 8 and can’t migrate to 17/21/etc. without modifications and a fuckton of testing, and companies will drag their feet to avoid that amount of time and effort. But yeah, starting around Java 21 or so, they’re basically backporting random Kotlin features into the main language. But if you’re maintaining legacy JEE apps for something like WebLogic? Good fuckin’ luck. And good fuckin’ luck explaining Spring Boot to boomers.
…I’d still rather be working with Kotlin, though. (Currently trapped in Java 8 hell, and hopefully getting my team’s main codebase up to Java 17 spec in a couple of weeks because a vendor is demanding it.)
1995 - Brendan Eich reads up on every mistake ever made in designing a programming language, invents a few more, and creates LiveScript. Later, in an effort to cash in on the popularity of Java the language is renamed JavaScript. Later still, in an effort to cash in on the popularity of skin diseases the language is renamed ECMAScript.
Later still, in an effort to cash in on the popularity of skin diseases the language is renamed ECMAScript.
that one got a good snort out of me
Humor so dry that you’re accidentally snorting dead skin flakes
the popularity of skin diseases
JavaScript is so bad its package management system has a self replicating info stealer worm currently circulating.
As someone who’s never really had to use JS for anything, man is it a messy language. I use Python mostly which has its issues, but if at least has the capability of being pretty robust if you care.
I do wish that Java wasn’t the zeitgeist and the scheme style language was used instead…
JS has moved in the functional language direction for at least the last decade modern JS is more scheme-like than Java-like tbh. the class abstraction doesn’t even work the same way in JS than it does in say java or C#
Oh I know, it’s just the syntax part that would be nice. Lisp syntax is great for highly functional stuff whereas it feels kinda forced in JS.
Like I said I mostly use Python, so “functional” to me is a comprehension statement (which I think is great syntax), but that type of thing just flows better with syntax specifically designed for it.
I have purposefully never learned JavaScript, miss me with that shit
You know shit’s bleak when Typescript – a Microsoft product – is the primary alternative, and it still compiles (“transpiles”) to fucking JavaScript
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