They’re a secondary sexual characteristic, so it seems like something that would get attention.

  • s38b35M5@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    You just haven’t met anyone like my partner. She pauses movies and TV to point out how my neck “is sexier” than the actor’s. “Yours isn’t little and thin like his.”

    “Thanks!”

    She is definitely obsessed. Maybe not a fetish, but certainly a point of interest.

    • casmael@lemm.ee
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      9 months ago

      Somehow I got a chuckle about how clueless and also pleased you appear in this account. Probably something to do with your line spacing but it felt well told. Nice.

      • s38b35M5@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Yes, I’m clueless with regard to others liking or noticing me. My partner sees it and points it out for my benefit. Usually with, “Poor man, never knew he was hot until he met me!”

        Everyone should be so lucky to be adored like I am now by my partner. And for things like, “your hands are perfect!”

        “They… are? Thanks!”

  • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    It is, indirectly, a cause of a common fetish: a nice, deep, bass-filled voice. Lots of women appreciate that.

    • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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      9 months ago

      I used to play Counter Strike a lot, and I generally played with randoms. It feels weird (but in a nice way) the number of people who have told me how nice or attractive my voice is. Admittedly it was mostly guys, and I’m straight, but it’s still a good compliment to get. I did make a lot of female friends on there though, with me consistently playing with one group. I don’t know if this is because of my voice or because I just treated them normally, but the voice didn’t hurt.

      … I don’t really know why I wrote this. I guess just as a general agreement women like rumbly voices, which I don’t think was needed. Oh well.

      • Wahots@pawb.social
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        9 months ago

        Complements are nice regardless of gender or orientation. Was flattering to be called cute by guys even if I wasn’t interested in them :)

      • TheRealKuni@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        I ended up dating a girl because she heard my voice on vent during a PUG raid in WoW. Was a mistake in the long run, but very flattering at the time.

    • numberfour002@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      I know this “seems” correct, but I’m curious if there’s actually a strong correlation between prominent adam’s apples and deep voices? In my experience, it’s not particularly strong. Plenty of guys with big adam’s apples don’t have deep voices and plenty of deep voiced men don’t have prominent adam’s apples.

  • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    To activate monkey neurons, it has to be an indicator of health.

    As an example, large breasts indicate health, as malnourishment during adolescence tends to result in smaller breasts later on.

    Muscles indicate health as well, so they tend to be considered attractive.

    For non health related features, like a symmetrical face, those ones are the non sexual dimorphic characteristics, as those ones you care about transferring regardless of sex. Both men and women want a symmetrical face, basically.

    So a large Adam’s apple is both a dimorphic feature and a non indicator of health, so its ignored.

      • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        “Small” breasts typically are still large compared to a man’s chest.

        There are other factors than size anyways, for any feature. For breasts as an example, symmetry, skin clarity, and firmness will also signal a healthy prospective mate.

        “Small” breasts usually actually means “not sagging due to age”, as naturally speaking breasts, cheeks, and the neck of humans are common areas where sagging due to collagen levels can be witnessed in older age, so these are common cited areas of sexyal attraction.

        So “small” breasts really just means “not old”, which is fairly normal to signal the health of a potentional sexual partner.

        • randomdeadguy@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Ok smart guy, explain this: I like mature women, ass play, humiliation, and bondage too. Sometimes simultaneously! Take that, evolution.

          • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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            9 months ago

            Mature women is straightforward, older = more knowledge and capable.

            Pretty much everything else you listed is about trust, so I’d say that trust is a very big thing you value in a partner, and due to humans very long time they spend dependant on parents and our community survival strategy, trust is very much a trait that is selected for.

            People that are untrustworthy are unattractive, a lot of kinks primarily build on top of publicly shameful acts in private, which is effectively the ultimate trust fall exercise.

            Feeling like you can trust a partner with such acts is very very positively reinforced genetically, so it becomes sexually attractive.

            In short: because humans live together and make complex communities, trust is important, which means getting kinky is very sexy as it signals deep rooted trust.

            • randomdeadguy@lemmy.world
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              9 months ago

              Okay, fine, but what about non-hetero attraction and relationships? There’s an entire spectrum of human attraction and sexuality. I know there was an old study about a genetic factor that would increase the likelihood of, in this case, a male being attracted to other males, but I am confused as to how a germline could propagate a heritable factor that would result in no offspring. I am not an expert.

              • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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                9 months ago

                This one is really interesting. Primarily speaking ants a good example of where this type of genetic expression is taken to its logical extreme.

                It’s basically the “aunt” and “uncle” survival trait that shows up in communal creatures. Homosexuality shows up in creatures that both need to raise their young and stay together in herds. So humans of course very much satisfy this condition.

                So how’s this relate to ants (and bees and termites too)?

                In a colony, technically speaking everyone is the queens offspring, so everyone are siblings.

                The queens aletes (prince and princess ants if you will) are only the queens offspring, all the drones dont sexually reproduce.

                Yet, the drones all care for the offspring as if they are their own, that’s kinda weird from a survival standpoint right?

                Well it’s simple, the drones are clones of the queen, so they also heavily share genetics with the offspring. From a genetic standpoint there’s no difference.

                So if the drones take care of the offspring like their own, and the offspring go on to mate, then the drones genetics also propagate. They have a evolutionary pressure to raise the babies despite not having any of their own.

                The same occurs for homosexuality. Human babies are a lot of work to take care of, and if you have a sibling you share a lot of genetics, then you have an evolutionary pressure to take care of your nephews and neices. It’s the “next best” option to propagating your own children. The genetic difference isn’t much worse.

                So what ends up happening is you have an evolutionary benefit if a percent of your population is born homosexual, as they will help with raising their nieces and nephews, and it turns out this combo has a net higher survival rate than just everyone being hetero.

                So over thousands of years we get this gradual pressure to settle on a sweet spot of some % of us being gay.

                This is also a solid explanation for the “fifth brother” thing, where every son a mother has is exponentially more likely to be gay. We haven’t fully isolated what causes it (its prolly hormones) but it’s a well known occurring phenomina that the more older brothers you have, the more likely you are to be gay.

                Based on the above supposition, it’d 100% make sense from an evolution standpoint for mothers to produce homosexual offspring if they have multiple healthy children, as after a certain point it makes sense strategy wise to have a couple gay uncles/aunts that naturally help their older siblings with childcare.

                It’s just way way better for survival in nature if not everyone is pumping out babies, and a handful just aren’t into that but still take care of their family.

                Basically it’s quality over quantity!

          • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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            9 months ago

            Orgasm is an escape from pain. Humiliation is painful. If you jerk off to escape that pain, it enacts classical conditioning so that humiliation causes your brain to anticipate sex.

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      9 months ago

      For non health related features, like a symmetrical face

      Your genes code for symmetry. Symmetry in the resulting body indicates a healthy upbringing.

  • evergreen@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    I dated a woman who said Adam’s Apples were one of her favorite features on a man. I wouldn’t say it was to the point of being a full blown fetish, but definitely something that she paid attention to. If I had to guess, I’d say she’s probably not the only one out there that feels that way.

  • steve_floof@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Why do you think anything primarily male would be a fetish?

    Prostate cancer, you’re next

    • wise_pancake@lemmy.caOP
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      9 months ago

      Wait, is prostate cancer the next fetish, or you’re wishing me to be the next prostate cancer patient?

      • Lemmeenym@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        There is a super depressing story of a YouTuber named Leathersmokemi who died engaging in a similar fetish. Nick Crowley did a good video on him. I don’t know of a fetish centered on prostate cancer specifically but there are cancer fetishists and the fetish centered on terminal illness is called nosaphillia so it’s certainly possible that there are fetishists already out there focused on prostate cancer specifically.

        • wise_pancake@lemmy.caOP
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          9 months ago

          That’s horrifying.

          There are also people who eat themselves to death for other people, like that avocado guy, and it’s just awful to know about.

      • DarkThoughts@fedia.io
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        9 months ago

        Prostate stimulation is sexy not because of the prostate itself but because it is incredibly sensitive and pleasuring when stimulated, which in turn is of course sexy for those who like to please their partner and are maybe also into butt stuff.

    • ricecake@sh.itjust.works
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      9 months ago

      It’s probably because a huger number of prominent secondary sexual sex characteristics get fetishized.

      A brief search seems to show that it’s an attractive quality like masculine forearms, and has a degree of fetish amongst the strangulation fetish community.

  • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Asking why a fetish isn’t common is kinda oxymoronic, in a way, considering all true fetishes are pretty rare. If you just mean ‘why aren’t they seen as attractive by straight women/other male-attracted groups’ then I can assure you they are.

    The whole neck, collar bone, shoulder and peck area is like, my favorite part of the male form, and I am not alone by a long shot. Maybe talk to more women about this stuff lol.

    Lots of us appreciate several parts of male anatomy in similar ways that straight men do female anatomy.

  • Boozilla@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    People are into all sorts of things, I’m sure it’s a turn-on for a few people. But yeah, very niche.

    I learned recently some folks are turned on by those dimples that some people have on their lower backs, AKA dimples of Venus.

    • evergreen@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      One of the strangest fetishes I’ve heard about was from a dude I used to work with. He told me he was into watching girls eating hamburgers. Especially when they take a big bite. He really emphasized that part to me. I feel bad because I remember struggling to keep a straight face and this guy just wanted to open up to me about something he normally hides. Ugh

      • Boozilla@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        That one sounds almost wholesome compared to some of the really weird stuff like diapers.

        But yeah, that must have been a very awkward conversation. I’d have probably laughed, unfortunately. Not in a judgmental way. I think someone smarter than me said that we laugh at things that don’t make sense to us.

        • evergreen@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Haha true about it seeming pretty wholesome. Yeah I definitely wasn’t judging him, it was just so random. But I would have felt awful if he thought I was judging him. Luckily I don’t think he did, because he went on for another minute or so about it.

          • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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            9 months ago

            50 years from now you’ll be canceled for this comment.

            Que? Tu a eatin flesh of sentient bemop, and dis sexy for you? Cancel this fool, sa sa que?

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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          9 months ago

          Actually we laugh at things that suddenly make sense. Laughing at things that make no sense is an attempt to get into that headspace.

  • Ð Greıt Þu̇mpkin@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    I mean maybe it is if you count chasers?

    Mostly it’s just that it’s not super noticeable on it’s own, not even in the indirect way something like the prostate can be

  • recapitated@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    IIRC from high school psychology, so forgive me if I’m way off base, but I don’t think fetishes for sexual characteristics are actually fetishes.