I genuinely thought this was true in middle school and got confused when my friends didn’t want that (it was still true for me though I’m totally cis you can tell by the way I am)
Yeah, I was pretty much convinced of the same thing while still in school: How could my class mates not want to change their gender? It’s the most amazing thing in the world to do! Who would say no to that?
If it was temporary then sure why not for a day or a week. As a permanent decision with the current level of technology, I don’t see the point at all.
not necessarily for you but for other trans people reading - transition isn’t going to make you cis but it can help a lot of things. at the very least, hormones can potentially provide a lot of mental benefits, even if you won’t get the exact body you want at the end of the day
and, y’know, if they don’t, you can always stop taking them
i legitimately believe this ~still cis tho~
Do you really want to still be cis tho?
meirl
Sure thing my cute goth cister! 😏
If this is a joke, I don’t get it. A lot of people don’t really care much about what their gender is
The joke is that the “egg” is under the impression that they are cis and that every cis male must have those same feelings.
On a surface level, sure, but most cis people never really have to grapple much with their gender identity.
So much this.
It is the very definition of being cis to not understand wanting to be a different gender than the one being assigned at birth. People who are uncomfortable with their assigned gender are not cis.
But many need a while to realize that other people do not feel the way they do.
Depends on what grapple means. Very few want to be a different gender than they were born, but practically everybody has been told to behave differently because “boys do X” or “girls do Y”. People just want to do whatever their interests predispose them to do or express themselves in some specific way that society often deems wrong. So yeah I haven’t ever really “wanted to be a girl” ever but a million times I wish people would leave me the fuck alone when they think I’m not being a man correctly.
practically everybody has been told to behave differently because “boys do X” or “girls do Y”.
I wish people would leave me the fuck alone when they think I’m not being a man correctly.
This is what I mean by ‘on a surface level.’
Oppositional sexism demands that those born in male bodies do masculine things, and those born in female bodies do feminine things. In other words it demands that everybody, not just those who are trans, conform to socially expected performances of gender.
However, cis people are afforded the security in feeling that their birth gender is the one that is ‘correct’ for them.
Cis people largely feel gender entitlement (projecting one’s own perception of gender onto other people, and privileging those perceptions over the way others understand themselves), hence:
A lot of people don’t really care much about what their gender is
Trans people do not get this privilege. Trans people face the same oppositional sexism that cis people do (that all people that exhibit exceptional gender expressions do), as well as having to face cis people’s gender entitlement being pushed onto them.
All this to say the joke is that the subject of the meme is in denial about their transness, and they are assuming that everybody feels the same way. The meme is a transfem centered meme- cis people may not get the joke; however many people DO care about their gender identity, but some identities are privileged over others.
There was nothing entitled about what I said. However you are minimizing the suffering that I and many others have gone through for not aligning to gender norms.
I’m literally not but you clearly have no interest in understanding the words I wrote, so I’ll just drop it.
I want to be treated like a girl in certain situations. But I’m keeping my cock n balls. 😤
Plenty of girls do tho
why would we want cooties?! so wrong!!
No no, by becoming girl you become immune to cooties so its actually a cootie preventing procedure.
How is becoming a vector prevention?
You are immune to getting sick from cooties. The cooties just live in us peacefully.
We’ll give this one a bit more time.
I like pooping! I couldn’t lose that!
I mean that should be pretty obvious. Why would you want to have an oily face? Why would anyone want to look like a rectangle and look like an ogre? For real tho, who?
EDIT: changed likw to like (written in italic 🇮🇹🥖🥐)
Why resemble a yeti when you could have TITS!? Amongst many other quality of life changes
I had quite a few friends who were girls who struggled with all of those things, that’s not a healthy view of womanhood
What exactly do you mean? The properties I described were supposed to be directed at the masculine characteristics I don’t like. Did you perhaps mean that some of these are not masc-exclusive?
Women and men both can have masculine features. I think they are saying that masculine features aren’t a male thing exclusively and arent inherently negative.
That’s a fair point. I personally just thought that most masc stuff is very uncomfortable.
The problem is, it depends who you ask. For me, I dont really have anyone pushing the idea of male and female stuff growing up, sort of like an atheist household might not talk about religion much.
I’m not saying that trans stuff isnt real, but it does seem like its to a degree a reaction to societies treatment of a person.
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Sorry, nope. Do not want.
Specifically, do not want the following:
- menstruation, cramps, PMS etc
- beauty and dress standards
- condescension
- social expectations of conduct
- lower pay and sometimes a hostile work environment (can go for anyone depending on the job - see male nurses)
- clothing without pockets - you can take my cargo pants from my cold dead hands.
Do want (but does not in any way make up for above):
- more colors and patterns in my clothes
- giving birth is kinda cool
Don’t forget to put “fruity scents” in the pro column. Women/girls get all the great smelling perfumes, body scents, soaps. Still rather be a boy because of all the negatives though
Same. I also like being stronger.
Me too, I agree. Except with the birth part.
Girls can wear cargo pants…
I wish I had the social support of girls and their close friends.
Otherwise, nah. Always liked who and what I am. But much love and good wishes to those who don’t.
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And make 30% less!?!
How did you all figure this out for yourself? I mean, what made it click?
I knew something was up when a friend came out to me and I realised it was possible to be something other than your assigned gender.
5 years later, I’m reading an article about a non-binary person and bam, it all made sense.
I wish I could have learned about nonbinary identity much earlier. Like back when I was having a crisis about my gender in high school I only knew the full binary MtF and FtM existed. But whenever I thought about it being a girl felt just as wrong as being a boy to me. Just for different reasons. No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t reconcile not wanting to be a boy, periodically wishing I had been born a girl, but not actually wanting to be a girl.
Wasn’t until about 12 years later at like 26 when I met my now wife and she told me all that sounded like nonbinary and I suddenly had things to Google. I wish I could have had a chance to actually transition before fully growing into being 6’2" and built like a fridge in a fursuit. But like now I’m 33, I had other medical issues that I didn’t want to try piling a potential transition on top of, and I’m not even sure what realistic transition goals I could even have let alone have a chance of attaining.
I can absolutely sympathise, I’ve got a bunch of medical issues and only began my transition journey recently, well past puberty. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done, the only goal I’d say you should ever have for your transition, is to be happy.
Also, it’s useful to keep in mind that there are many ways of affirming your gender other than medical stuff, though I’ll admit the medical transition has been the best for me.
I kinda have the opposite experience of gender, I feel equally comfortable as being boy and girl though generally prefer a mix at most times. It’s do cool to me how differently we can experience these sorts of things
Define “figure out.” I figured out I disliked being male by considering what I liked and disliked about myself. All the positives were more feminine or neutral, while all the negatives were masculine or masc coded. I decided on NB, but it still felt off. I didn’t want to be considered male, but I didn’t know if I wanted to be female.
For years I couldn’t parse my feelings when I imagined myself as a woman. I felt better, but I struggle with even identifying emotions, so it wasn’t clear enough to convince me. Eventually, I imagined myself as a mother: being pregnant, giving birth, raising a child that was my own. It felt so euphoric that I broke down crying because I knew I could never go back.
I still took another 5-6 months to start the process of coming out. I was still uncertain and terrified when I finally took the leap of faith. I was on death’s door mental health wise. I realized I could not carry on any longer as a man, yet it still took so much effort to make the best decision I’ve ever made.
It was night and day. I never thought I could be so happy or love life like that. It’s a miracle that I made it 23 years feeling like I wasn’t alive.
Thanks for sharing. I think maybe my dysphoria isn’t as strong. I guess I’d gravitate more towards being non binary than fully identifying with being a man/woman (what does it even mean). But I’m not sure, I feel physically fine in my body, but I guess I’m still questioning a lot of things.
WillStealYourUsername has already given a very good overview, to add to that…
It is a highly individual process and while many trans people share certain experiences, no two trans people will have exactly the same kind of journey.
While the public perception of trans people is very much focused on the rather rare cases of young children who will insist on being trans from an early age on. While these cases definitely exist, far more trans people are going through a gradual process of realization. There may be a final “egg crack” (the moment of final realization), but it is usually preceded by a slow process of smaller realizations and it is nowhere near a linear process…
As WillStealYourUsername describes so well, in hindsight all the signs and individual quirks make sense, but most people have to attain a certain level of self-acceptance before being able to recognize the various symptoms for what they are.
In my personal case, it was an intense jealousy of fem people that would never go away and culminated in a moment where I had an emotional meltdown over a fictional character who transitioned from male to female in their storyline. That’s when I finally realized that I could do the same thing if I got my shit together and accepted being trans.
It varies from person to person. Sometimes it’s stuff like body dysphoria (MRI’s show that trans peoples biological sex don’t match the sex of the brain, likely the brains mapping of the body is therefore often somewhat incorrect), sometimes there is just a feeling, sometimes there is a noticeable comfort or discomfort with presenting this or that way, sometimes there are thoughts and dreams, sometimes there are behavioral or mental effects.
How people react to going through puberty can be telling as well, as it seems the brain is kinda programmed to want a certain mix of hormones. Some trans people report a variety of shitty mental symptoms going away when receiving hrt, and coming back when stopping. Some react very negatively to the physical changes brought on by puberty.
I remember day dreaming about finding out that I’m intersex (I didn’t know the term, I had just heard about something similar happening somewhere) and a doctor telling me I could choose to be a girl when I was a kid. I would always pick female characters in video games, it was always just harder to be invested in male characters even if they were never visible. I would always make them look like what I imagined I would look like as a girl/woman.
I had my mom dress me up as a girl for halloween once and have had a number of cross dressing occasions throughout my childhood.
I never liked having short hair and frequently let it grow out. I was always jealous of the clothes girls got to wear.
I never really clicked with guy stuff, though I didn’t have very feminine hobbies or interests either. Stuff that was male-coded was however extra unappealing to me just because it was male-coded.
The idea of being very masculine was extremely unappealing, and I was secretly very proud and happy of every comment and compliment I received about behaving feminine or being non-masculine.
I was casually a woman in 50% of my daydreams and was always fascinated by fiction involving swapping genders and being accepted for who you were etc.
I don’t like my face or my beard all that much despite looking perfectly alright, and I really disliked having any body fat at all (I don’t mind a healthy bit of body fat nearly as much now that my hormones tell my body to store it in feminine places).
Anyways, I never really suspected I was trans until like a year ago despite feeling kinda text book in hindsight.
EDIT: Hope the wall of text isn’t overwhelming. The TLDR is it’s complicated, and the only way to know is to just know or try stuff out until you feel comfortable :)
EDIT 2: I figured out I was trans by reading the definition and symptoms, thinking about it for a couple of months, and then trying some stuff out.
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I mean, I really don’t. I’m not particularly gung-ho about being male, but I don’t think I’d be happier as a girl because my problems stem from socioeconomic stresses, rather than anything to do with my gender perception or body image.
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![egg_irl [Transfem meme]](https://files.botsin.space/media_attachments/files/112/559/575/432/621/092/original/38f97b473b27de89.jpg){kind=link}