• Cave Johnson@futurology.today
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    4 months ago

    For those of you who received the placebo universe, you are free to collect your Aperture Science Survivalist Boy Scouts badge and leave with your parents. As for everybody else, a member of our Aperature for Adolescents team is on their way to escort you to the lab, where you will be placed in indefinite cryostatis. The boys in legal have just informed us that you are now legally classified as weapons of mass destruction and are, unfortunately, a walking, currently-breathing violation of the Geneva Convention.