• Makeshift@sh.itjust.works
    642·
    2 months ago

    Genuinely though, it would not surprise anymore. We have subscription based cars selling your info to insurance companies, retroactively ammended purchase experiences everywhere, and every dang app and website harvesting as much info on you as physically possible no matter how mundane.

    Dick info reporting toilets would not at all catch me by surprise at this point.

    • RogueBanana@lemmy.zipEnglish
      8·
      2 months ago

      Dick info reporting seems pointless but they can add an advert screen above the urinal (which is sadly becoming common) and track your eye movement to record engagement rates.

      • Makeshift@sh.itjust.works
        151·
        2 months ago

        Yes I’m aware. I’m saying that IF it were an actual thing, it would not be surprising at all considering the extent of invasive, non-consentual data collection and selling that happens all over the place these days.

  • Zozano@lemy.lolEnglish
    40·
    2 months ago

    il_1588xN.1998833855_27ng-4090175647

    That’s why I invest in wireless, RFID resistant, anti-flash dick screening devices. Wake up sheeple!

      • Zozano@lemy.lolEnglish
        3·
        2 months ago

        Its not just tamper proof, it’s future proof!

        One day they’ll want to manually inspect your cock before getting on a plane.

        Well I’m sorry Mr. TSA, my WMD is none of your business.

    • BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world
      1·
      2 months ago

      Automation stealing our jobs again. My grandpa was a penis inspector. He worked long, hard hours to put three kids through school and food on the table.

  • tpihkal@lemmy.worldEnglish
    18·
    2 months ago

    What does matter is length times diameter plus weight over girth divided by angle of the tip squared.

    • davidagain@lemmy.world
      3·
      2 months ago

      I have so many questions. Are you measuring angle from the vertical or the horizontal? Whereabouts should I be placing the ruler for that tangent? Are we using metric or imperial units? If metric, is it square centimetres or kilograms per cm, and if it’s imperial, is it square inches or ounces per inch per square degree?

  • IMNOTCRAZYINSTITUTION@lemmy.world
    18·
    2 months ago

    real shit, these things are mechanical turks. they really are cameras that are live streaming to centers in third world countries. when the poorly paid operator sees you’re done, he sends the flush signal to the toilet. if you’ve ever been in a bathroom where the “sensor is broken” and it seems to flush at random, it’s because they just keep flushing it periodically if they can’t get a visual. real truth

    • Capt. Wolf@lemmy.world
      12·
      2 months ago

      Sorry, but no, you forgot duration it took to void, stream color, taste, smell, accuracy, flow consistency, body hair grooming, presence and degree of curvature, and overall hygiene. We’ve gone ahead and shared your supplied data with our 1869 advertising and heathcare partners. Thank you for opting in! We will continue to collect data at all of our established locations and now through your personal cell phone! Have a nice day!

  • stupidcasey@lemmy.world
    122·
    2 months ago

    How else would we keep the girls out of the mens room? I personally am willing to give up a little privacy if it means protection from A foreign government, besides you don’t have anything to worry about as long as you have a dick, and to those arguing that those of us with smaller than average members might get thrown in prison unjustly I say just grow a bigger slong, Besides are people with small penis really men? I mean yeah technically it’s on there birth certificate but come on.