But think how safe you would be if you did pack a bomb.
The odds of there being one bomb on a plane are tiny enough, but the odds of there being two bombs on a plane are vanishingly small…
The only way to stop a bad guy with a bomb…
You really need to pack one bomb for each family member really. Kid’s bombs just help lower the odds to virtually zero.
Pack a bomb??
I’m worried about them randomly selecting my bag for drug inspection or the bag being tagged in the X-ray… And the TSA agents judging my bag packing method and skills
I just wish I didn’t have to take electronics out of my bag for security, doing all of this is already stressful.
The easiest way to avoid this is to make sure you always pack a bomb on purpose.
“The probability of having a bomb on a plane is very low, and the probability of having two bombs on the same plane is virtually zero.”
personally, I like to make their day interesting by wearing a shirt that says, “I am the bomb!”
Have you tried a shirt with, “You’re the bomb!” on it?
Not. yet.
*Don’t say ‘bomb’. Don’t accidentally say ‘bomb’. Don’t say ‘bomb’.
“Hey, I didn’t bring a bomb! DOH!”
Me at American Airports: Why the fuck do I have to take off my belt/shoes and throw away my water? They just let me walk into a crowded airport with this shit…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_Brussels_bombings
The solution to the airport being bombed right in front of the security line: while they rebuilt they packed everyone even tighter in temporary tents with longer queues. Then they rebuilt everything the same.
Terrorists and security theater designers operate on the same logic: 30 dead in a security line is nowhere near as big of a deal as 30 dead in an airplane. You only become a high value target when you’re 30k feet in the air, even if the end result is materially identical.
30 dead in a security line is nowhere near as big of a deal as 30 dead in an airplane
I understand your point, but the airplane usually has well over 100 people on it and itself can also fall out of the sky and hurt people that aren’t on it
Security theater is annoying bullshit that doesn’t even catch a shocking number of shit, but planes get more attention for what should be obvious reasons
And all those potentially explosive water bottles are sitting in a trash can at the security checkpoint.
This indicates that they know full well that their are no explosives among them. It’s just theatre.
Because… Beyond this line, property is threatened. Planes are expensive. You can die in the front, we can rebuild that cheaply. But planes are expensive.
Remember kids, if you see uniformed authority figures, they are there to protect property above all else.
Earlier this year I had a connection in Doha, Qatar on my way to the US. I had to go through security twice even though it was a connection from another international flight (first was after getting off the first flight and the second was right before getting on second flight). Both times they took away all liquids, even those bought in the airport.
At this point, I’m really wondering if it’s not a plot to sell water.
They let you dump the water out, keep the bottle, and refill it at the bottle filling stations once you’re inside.
That’s not just in American airports.
“did you pack this bag yourself?”
“Yes?”
“Then why is there a tactical nuclear warhead in the left pocket?”
“Ah shucks”It’s 26 to 32 kg so it’s its own piece of luggage https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/W54#/media/File%3ASADM_carry_bag.jpg
I always get concerned that somehow I have packed hard drugs (I don’t do hard drugs.)
For my next trick, I shall pull a condom full of coke out of your ass. I assure you we did not plant it ahead of time.
If you’re traveling somewhere with extremely restrictive drug laws (e.g. Singapore), you can be sentenced to prison for drug particles on your shoes. i.e. you can accidentally have forbidden substances on you.
Do they test everyone’s shoes or do you just have to be extremely unlucky?
I’d assume they’re just doing the rounds with drug sniffer dogs. Those dogs have crazy sensitivity.
Drug dogs have an average success rate of about 44%.
If they’re sniffing around a Latino that rate drops to 27%.
They can sort of smell drugs, sometimes, but more often than not they are simply a tool that manufactures probable cause.
It’s not that they " can sort of smell drugs", they are extremely sensitive to any trace smell of drug. Your linked article confirms that:
Dog-handling officers and trainers argue the canine teams’ accuracy shouldn’t be measured in the number of alerts that turn up drugs. They said the scent of drugs or paraphernalia can linger in a car after drugs are used or sold, and the dogs’ noses are so sensitive they can pick up residue from drugs that can no longer be found in a car.
Search so thoroughly that you would even find the tiniest crumbs left on someone’s shoe sole and that 44% “success” rate would probaby jump up considerably.
Though the false positives that are mentioned in the article are also an issue, but probably less so if you’re regularly doing the rounds at airport waiting queues.
That’s too bad, so much that happens in World War Z (book) depends on dogs being able to smell sus shit out
More like “I sure hope I didn’t pack a bottle of water by accident” (or any other liquit in a container of more than 100ml).
I have the reverse thing, after the check I’m like “I got away with it once again!”, while packing absolutely nothing wrong.
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I’m sure counter strike would be a decent option
“no russian”
you’re fine as long as you’re not using a Galaxy Note 7.
Or just be non-white. Then you will know you are going to be selected for a special screening.
Me when someone is looking through my phone
sure hope they don’t see all the weird sex I’ve been having with their daughters
I got tired of worrying about whether or not I packed a bomb and would be caught so I decided to just do so and get it over with.
In reality I just grabbed a 2 pound brick of scrapple wrapped it in wires that I soldered to a watch and stuck it in the middle of my backpack.
Got to enjoy my scrapple on the other side and felt far more confident about my future in scrapple smuggling.