• ryedaft@sh.itjust.works
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    16 days ago

    Can women message people on Tinder they haven’t matched with?

    And if this was effective wouldn’t it lower all women’s Elo scores? Unless he only ignored one group and catfished everybody else. Sounds like a lot of work.

    • dai@lemmy.world
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      15 days ago

      No, only tinder premium can do so IIRC.

      Bumble? From memory women can only message first, men must wait to be messaged before they can.

      It’s been a while since I used those platforms so my information could be incorrect.

        • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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          15 days ago

          Yeah, the old Bumble model was better (in my opinion as a man). It creates incentive to have an interesting profile with stuff people can comment on. The newer “opening move” thing incentivizes generic responses. Bumble (in my experience) still has women message first far more often than Tinder though. You may just have to wait and not message immediately.

          Creating an opening message is only really difficult if someone has a generic boring profile, so if it’s an issue for anyone maybe that’s why.

          • Buglefingers@lemmy.world
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            15 days ago

            I agree it was a better model. I’ve never found it easy to begin a conversation even with someone who has a good profile. I just struggle with the formulation of an opener. Way easier in person IMO, though a good profile makes a conversation continuation much easier.

          • Buglefingers@lemmy.world
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            15 days ago

            Yeah, pretty much haha, otherwise its just tinder. I used it briefly a while back and usually the first message would be “.” so that I could start the actual conversation. So I supposed it’s never been all that different to begin with

          • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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            15 days ago

            If the best you can do is say hello, that’s pretty pethetic.

            The complaint is that Bumble had something that made it unique: that women sent the first message. On other services anyone can message first, but 99.9% of the time that ends up being the man, which is fine but having something attempt to switch that up was cool. Bumble removing this makes it more like everything else.