You gotta give it biometrics. For your fingerprint, WHAT IF SOMBODY BROKE INTO YOUR HOUSE AND SHAT ON YOUR TOILET!!!
We need to verify its you!
see there keeping you safe from those shitty bastards!!
So just uhh give us all permissions
If your wondering there will be a preroll ad for the app and every 20minutes it will turn off your lights to your bathroom. And prompt you on your cellular device “are you still shitting?”
And recommend poo docters in your local area using target ads
I wish I was kidding when I say there exist asshole recognition tech already. They’ll just attach that to your advertiser ID so their worldwide network of ‘smart toilets’ can deliver targeted ads to every stall and urinal you visit.
You gotta give it biometrics. For your fingerprint, WHAT IF SOMBODY BROKE INTO YOUR HOUSE AND SHAT ON YOUR TOILET!!! We need to verify its you! see there keeping you safe from those shitty bastards!! So just uhh give us all permissions
If your wondering there will be a preroll ad for the app and every 20minutes it will turn off your lights to your bathroom. And prompt you on your cellular device “are you still shitting?” And recommend poo docters in your local area using target ads
So, if I let a guest shat on my toilet, I have to join and gave my fingerprint permission to flush their shit? Nice.
If an ad starts, the ultimate arkward silence will be better. “Oh look it’s an ad for Iron-meds, your shit looks like you need them.”
I wish I was kidding when I say there exist asshole recognition tech already. They’ll just attach that to your advertiser ID so their worldwide network of ‘smart toilets’ can deliver targeted ads to every stall and urinal you visit.
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The fuck