• Midnight Wolf@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    edit-2
    11 hours ago

    “sometimes, you have to smell the atrocious to really understand the positive”

    shitting in agony, crying, the bowl soaked in sweat and tears, their hand and legs quivering

    “that’s why FuckYourself Maximum Dosage really starts your day off by ruining it in some of the worst suffering we have seen in clinical trials. it’s not a side effect, it’s a main one!”

    ‘oh fuck make it STOP AAAAGGGHHHHHHH’

    “after pinpointing the issue, we then turned the concoction up to 11! now when you are finally able to pick yourself up off the floor and wash yourself of feces, you can enjoy the rest of your day knowing that it can only get better from here”

    smelling a lush garden full of flowers baking in sun rays, eyes closed and smiling, as a burning 747 goes down in the distance, and the scene fades with a nuclear bomb exploding

    “FuckYourself Maximum Dosage; ask your doctor if it’s right for you. Or an ex. Or a bastard boss. Don’t be shy, we will prescribe it to anyone!”

    fade to black