I guess that’s the orthodox interpretation, that it’s the eggs that were bad. But like, if you actually watch what he’s doing, he just vaguely pokes at them while they burn to the bottom of the pan, and then he serves them while they’re still liquid. And they don’t call him an accomplished cook, the closest anyone gets is elevator shaft saying “Ooh, a practiced hand!” in response to Riker pouring the eggs into a pan.

But…we’ve seen it. It happened in an episode. Dude can’t cook eggs.

Tell me you wouldn’t watch at least 30 minutes of Riker failing to scramble eggs.

After awhile, Poseiden comes and kicks your ass until you stop. Live by the magic sword, die by the magic sword.

I like the mental image of a dwarf ship that’s 6 ft tall and got 47 masts to make up for it.

Imagine the emotional and physical damage of taking your first shit in thousands of years.

Can’t recall things you never knew.

Your character doesn’t know that information.

A wizard did it.

No one actually plays dnd like that though…

Given what Mountain Dew has done to me, that tracks.

Jokes on you, we play every rpg!

Bards aren’t just “a talented musician” they literally use magic. They’re basically wizards that went the liberal arts path in college.

Yeah, in that case I think you did everything that could reasonably be expected of you.

A war could always just end by the bad guy (from your perspective) winning decisively.

I think as a teenager I played a lot of Bards because being likeable and everyone doing what you say is kind of nice when you’re an awkward disempowered kid, but nowadays I mix it up. Mostly just because playing the same character repeatedly would get kind of boring for me, and I want to explore different territory, even if it’s on the level of “original the hedgehog donut steal”

That’s kind of funny in a terrible way when you consider that a lot of security research is pentesting.

Therapist: “Also you’re fat”

Patient: [incoherent sobbing]

Therapist: “Ok so you’re insecure about that too, try to work on that…”

I think that was the right action, but you could have explained better. Instead of just “Ok, you stay at the tavern” something like “Ok, you can stay at the tavern if you really want to, but you do understand that will mean you’re sitting here bored all afternoon while the rest of us play, right?”

Everybody’s gotta learn some time

Mac and cheese for dinner is lame and lazy too, but also fucking delicious. TTRPGS are something your friends put together for you out of love, not necessarily some clinically perfect professional product. And to extend the metaphor, if you go to a dinner party and start bitching about your friend not plating the food like a Michelin star place, you’re an asshole.