Today I spoke to a coworker who had bad experiences with doctors and was seeking recommendations for a new one, then other coworkers chimed in, and so I decided to ask you guys as well. Well, not for a doctor recommendation, but about your bad experienced with doctors?

I’m gonna spoiler mine, because it makes me very uncomfortable, so perhaps it may make someone else very uncomfortable.

uncomfortable

I had a doctor who had no business in it make me show my intimate parts (I’m intersex) and she touched them. She was curious, I guess…? She’s a psychiatrist, so, again, literally 0 business doing so. I already have trauma from regular people who treat me like a circus display, I really had no need for someone with systemic power over me using it like that…

No, I didn’t report this. I was a teenager and barely functioning at the time. :/

  • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    My wife, going through peri-menopause, was told (after reporting extremely low energy, increased migraines, and low libido) by her doctor that he wasn’t comfortable doing any hormonal supplements until a year after menopause was confirmed finished. That could potentially be up to a decade later.

    Women’s health comprehension is fucking embarrassing… if you were AFAB and have any sort of hormonal or abdominal issues, please see a fucking specialist immediately. Most GPs/Family Doctors are absolutely fucking clueless.

    • tetrachromacy@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      If you can, try to get in and see an endocrinologist. They specialize in hormones and their effects on the body.

      I saw one with my partner for her specific issues and it’s made a big difference in quality of care. For one, the endo actually listens to her and works with us to find the problem. Experiences may differ but a specialist is the right path, if you’re able to see one. Hope you get a chance to - it took us months to get an appointment with one near us, but it’s been worth it so far.

    • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 year ago

      The fact thar your wife went to a GP instead of going directly to a women health doctor is an interesting choice to me as a german.
      Afaik (am male) women go for everything related to down there and related to the specialised women doctor. GP is for and to treat general illnesses like a cold, vaccination shots, health questions or to transfer to another specialist like cardiologist, neurology, etc. so you can get an appointment.

      • ellabee@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        then the correct answer from the Dr should’ve been a referral to a gyno, not “that shouldn’t be treated yet in my medical opinion”.

        and she may not have realized it was perimenopause when she went to the Dr. fatigue and migraines alone could easily sap libido and be completely unrelated to anything “down there”.

        • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 year ago

          Totally agreed. Should have been referred.
          But I’m no doctor and didn’e experience the whole story.

  • daisy [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    “It’s not whooping cough. Sure, you have all the symptoms of whooping cough and live in an area with an active whooping cough outbreak, doesn’t matter, I don’t think it’s whooping cough.”

    multiple visits later in a single week as symptoms worsen

    Fine, here’s a prescription for amoxicillin, you hypochondriac, but I don’t think it will do anything for you.”

    whooping cough clears up completely

    I do trust medical science but that experience was easily the worst of my adult life. Whooping cough is no joke, folks.

    • Neshura@bookwormstory.social
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      1 year ago

      I guess the problem with modern medicine usually isn’t that treatment is unavailable but that the person in front of you is too arrogant or incompetent to properly diagnose that treatment is needed and which treatment would work best.

  • PonyOfWar@pawb.social
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    1 year ago

    Nothing on that level of messed up, but probably the worst for me was having a homeopathic doctor as a child who prescribed me sugar pills as medicine.

    • 𝕃𝕒𝕞𝕓@lemmy.zipOP
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      1 year ago

      Sharing woes is never a competition, don’t ever worry about this. I’m sorry you had the doctor! That’s messed up, especially since it could’ve potentially affected your development. :(

      • PonyOfWar@pawb.social
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        1 year ago

        Probably didn’t harm me ultimately, as he did prescribe regular medicine when it was really needed (in addition to some sugar pills usually). Still, it might not have harmed me, but it sure didn’t help me, only filling the pockets of some quack companies.

    • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 year ago

      My workplace has some as customers…I cringe everytime I see behind the counter…

      Edit: Solely by the story I guessed the country and checked your profile for confirmation. Suspicion was quickly confirmed.

      • Neshura@bookwormstory.social
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        1 year ago

        My Mother was on that whole trip for a long time, she still has some around but now admits and recognizes that the most you’ll get out of those damn pills is a placebo effect (ideal for children with minor woes like a scratched knee)

        Was one hell of a ride getting her to that point though

        • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 year ago

          Not quite. More like DACH region than NL.
          The whole homeopathy and “globuli” debate is a big think around DE since the health insurance companies finance the whole fake sugar pill shit.
          Yes, you read the right: The health insurance, paid by tax dollar and insurance fees, finance this stuff.

          • 𝕃𝕒𝕞𝕓@lemmy.zipOP
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            1 year ago

            Ah, pardon me, thank you for clarifying! I moved to Germany not that long ago and was advised to amend my insurance to opt out from homeopathy and I did so before seeing any doctors. ^ ^’

  • GrayBackgroundMusic@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I was having some unusual medical issues and went to a doctor recommended by a friend. They seemed OK. I researched their treatment and it seemed OK. After a while I was having severe side effects and decided to find a more main stream doctor, a proper endocrinologist.

    They were appalled at the dosage from the previous doctor. I had been started on 2x the maximum dose! Usually people start at 0.5x the dose and step up if it’s not enough.

    That went fine for a bit, but I was having some discomfort administering the medicine and asked my GP. He lost his temper (not at me). The previous 2 doctors had gone straight to the simplest but most side effects solution. He explained that there are 5 different treatments for my condition! I was suffering thru unnecessary side effects because the previous doctors hadn’t even discussed these other solutions with me. I wasn’t aware of them at all.

    So pissed.

    • Neshura@bookwormstory.social
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      1 year ago

      Doctors can be so incredibly hit or miss and the worst part is there is no good way to check the reputation of a doc beforehand.

        • michaelrose@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          It’s deeply weird that it rates Staff Punctuality Helpfulness Knowledge and then averages them. Kinda funny that if Dr Ned had a nice nurse he would probably rate higher than House.

  • Streetdog@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    I’ve had eczema all my life. Mostly on my face/arms/legs, whenever exposed (summer/winter). Have been prescribed a shitton of steroid-based ointments. That never worked. From GP to dermatologists, they never knew coz “eczema can’t be explained”, so they always “assumed” stuff, blaming the heat, the cold, the dust, the sun, the water, too much soap, too little soap (calling me dirty).

    Not once did they (offer me to) test for allergies. Just assumed it was something unexplainable. Just live with it.

    Even been called a liar when I told them those steroid-based ointments actually make it worse.

    I moved to another country, still had this eczema. Worse actually. 1 GP visit and an allergy test later it appears I have a mold allergy.

    Doesn’t help I have lived and still live in an even more humid environment. Rain is the worst, because the spores come out. But with the help of some anti-histamines I have been eczema free for a few years. Mold thrives on steroids, so I avoid that.

    • 𝕃𝕒𝕞𝕓@lemmy.zipOP
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      1 year ago

      I’m so sorry you went through it. I had a doctor accuse me of taking a medication I don’t have to change my blood test results. He still believes I lied. We are waiting on another test result. He suggested I should see another doctor. I don’t even smoke, don’t drink, don’t do drugs, how the fuck would I get a medication to mess with my blood results?

      Glad someone finally figured out what’s the cause of your issue! <3

      • Streetdog@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Doctors are still people and people make mistakes.

        Yet it’s hard to not hold a grudge against a doctor telling you you’re a liar. Let alone if multiple say the same thing. Especially if they do it “by the book” so to speak.

        The experience I had here, another country, the GP just looked at my eczema (basically eyes, fingers, spots on legs and arms all red and itchy af) and said without a doubt in her voice “allergy.” And was she right about that. So don’t give up hope.

        Edit: Not that I meant to say you should move to another country. Just that because here it is more humid, there is more mold, so more similar cases might have passed this GP in her time practicing.

  • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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    That time in 2004 I requested a specific kind of birth control from my doctor because I had just had a baby with the most horrific postpartum depression you could ever imagine, and I never wanted to go through that ever again.

    In retrospect it’s clear that the doctor was uncomfortable with the mere thought of inserting an IUD, he had probably never done it before, and he did not want to do it. He didn’t say that, but the discomfort on his face was obvious, and he talked me up about some sort of a birth control patch like a sticker that I wear on my arm.

    I did not want a sticker on my arm. I wanted an IUD.

    But he sent me away with the arm sticker and I didn’t want it so I didn’t put it on. I felt hopeless and unheard and invalidated and that nothing I wanted mattered.

    Two years later my husband got me pregnant again 😭

    Postpartum depression is absolutely hell and I wouldn’t wish this psychological trauma on Hitler himself.

    17 years later the good news is my second child turned out to be the most angelic cute brilliant hilarious precious gift you could ever imagine.

  • HubertManne@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    I had a primary care woman who felt there was no need to talk about birth control since I was married. 20+ years married and no kids. whooooooooo!!!

  • Fosheze@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    When I first got officially diagnosed with depression the doc prescribed me an antidepressant and when I asked about sideffects he said “noone ever gets any sideffects from this med”. It literally had a black box warning and a CVS recipt of known sideeffects. Also yes there were definitely sideffects. Luckily the pharmacist wasn’t a moron like the doc and actually told me what to expect.

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      My psychiatrists told me for well over a decade that they reason it takes antidepressants a couple weeks to start working is they need to build up in the blood.

      Later research showed that antidepressants work through neurogenesis, same way as exercise. The thing that takes two weeks is the proliferation of new and differentiated cells eventually leading to new emotional states.

      This whole “build up in the blood” thing never made any sense. If you ingest MDMA or alcohol it doesn’t need time to build up in the blood. The timeframe for an ingested chemical to reach peak volumes in the blood is about 30-60 minutes.

      This story never made sense, yet it was accepted and parroted by doctors everywhere.

      • Fosheze@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        This depends on the antidepressant. Most modern antidepressants have a relatively short half-life in the body. For example the one I’m on now has a half-life of about 10 hours. However one of the first SSRIs and the still most frequently prescribed one, Fluoxetine, has a half life of 4 days for the medication itself and its metabolite has a half-life of up to 10 days. So that one does literally take weeks to fully build up in the blood and that’s probably why doctors use that line.

        Regardless, even with the shorter half-life drugs it does take a couple of weeks for your brain to adjust to the altered neurotransmitter levels. So even if it’s not technically “waiting for it to build up in the blood”, the result is the same and it’s an easily understandable explanation for doctors to use even if it’s not technically correct.

    • stolid_agnostic@lemmy.ml
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      Doctors will absolutely gaslight your symptoms with anything that affects your brain. They don’t care that you can’t sleep or eat or have sex or experience emotions, it’s all about throwing pills at the problem until one seems to work a little bit and doesn’t make your life shit. I’ve never met a psychiatrist capable of basic human empathy.

      • Fosheze@lemmy.world
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        There are a lot of really shitty doctors out there that do shit like that but there are still decent ones too. Luckily the one in my initial post wasn’t my primary care doc. I couldn’t get in to see my normal doc at the time so I just got Dr. Dumbass instead.

        My primary care doc is actually great with dealing with my depression despite it not being his area of expertise. I’d love to get in to see a psych and therapist but they’re all so booked up my doctor can’t even get me on a waiting list so he just does the best he can on his own. He literally called up that department while I was in the office with him and they basically gave him a flat no and then hung up on him. Durring one of my initial appointments he just straight up told me that mental health isn’t an area he knows much about but as time went on it became clear that he was putting in a ton of effort to actually educate himself. Now whenever I’m having an issue related to my depression or medications sideeffects he can quickly come up with multiple potential solutions discuss the pros and cons of each one with me and ask which one I want to try. Needless to say I will be keeping this doctor even if it means I need to lock him in my basement.

  • girl@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I’ve had ~ a dozen minor bad experience with doctors and nurses, and one awful experience (still not as bad as assault).

    The worst one started with severe endometriosis pain, I was hyperventilating (without realizing it) for hours. My fingers eventually curled up and rendered my hands useless, which triggered a panic attack and more hyperventilating. I went to the ER because I had never experienced a loss of function in my hands before, it was terrifying. The nurse stuck me in a room and left me to my terror for hours, I cried and begged for someone to help me. Another nurse came by at some point, I heard them outside asking “is she okay?” and my main nurse just told them I was being stupid and needed to cry it out. She eventually came in to explain that hyperventilating causes a buildup of CO2 in the blood, which led to my fingers curling up, so I had to calm down for it to improve. She at no point offered me any kind of calmative, not even something basic like gabapentin. I eventually felt enough shame that I calmed down and went home.

    All the little experiences just fucked with my ability to trust my doctors (as individuals, not medicine as a whole). Doctors just blankly staring at me when I show them something they’ve never seen before, or telling me that the 3” tumor growing on my leg is “so small it’s almost nothing!” when they know I have a genetic mutation that severely limits my cells abilities to keep benign tumors from turning into cancer. I have a handful of health issues I need to go see doctors for again, but I have no confidence they won’t just tell me it’s all in my head again.

    Edit: oh yea, the most comical time was when a dentist gaslit me about basic human anatomy. I’m not a doctor but I have a B.S., I can read basic anatomy diagrams. I get really intense pain at the hinge of my jaw, right in front of my ears, when I eat something for the first time in a few hours. It’s definitely salivary stones. My dentist told me that salivary glands don’t exist there, so that can’t be it. Except they do. It’s pretty easy to figure that out lol. I asked her “okay, what else could it be then?” And she just grunted at me.

  • DessertStorms@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    Jfc, I’m sorry that happened to you, how awful.

    I’ve had all sorts of bad experiences, from one doctor looking down my top at my boobs without warning or permission, to the “normal” doubt dismissal and denial of anything being wrong with me despite much evidence to the contrary…

    Doctors so often fucking suck, and I’m so sick of it being taboo to even say so. Medical school should include bringing them down a couple of pegs before they’re ever allowed to even interact with patients.

    • 𝕃𝕒𝕞𝕓@lemmy.zipOP
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      I’m so sick of it being taboo to even say so.

      YESSSS! And the worst is, they trust one another so the longer you suffer from an issue, the less seriously they treat it. I had a therapist who got diagnosed in her 30s with a life-long disease she always sought help for. She ended up movement impaired due to it proceeding with no treatment. Doctors called her a drug-seeker, school-skipper and so on. All she needed was to be treated seriously.

      Really glad to had met you. It’s really reassuring to see people who understand, as much as I wish you wouldn’t understand as I’d prefer you would had never had experienced that.

      • DessertStorms@kbin.social
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        No matter how many stories like yours and your friends (which sounds very similar to mine) I hear, it never gets les enraging that we’re just left to not only suffer at the time, but for the rest of our lives in many cases, because some doctor values their ego over their patients.

        But yeah, it’s always nice to find people who know what you’ve been through, even if both (all) wish they hadn’t… 💜

  • Mothra@mander.xyz
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    1 year ago

    After a minor gynecologic surgical procedure I was feeling really anxious and could barely feel anything since the local anaesthetic was still in effect. The doctor left the room, and the nurse (a woman past her 50s) said I peed myself and that I should be careful when leaving since it was likely to happen again. It was all a lie, as I later realised. When I was able to check myself and saw I was perfectly fine and dry, I understood what that fleeting moment of glee on her face was all about.

    Bitch Nurse I hope you die of chronic incontinence if any such thing exists.

    • 𝕃𝕒𝕞𝕓@lemmy.zipOP
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      Holy fuck. Why are so many nurses so vile? I had nurses cover me in a pile of extremely warm blankets in a room heated to the highest temperature to a point where it felt like I was having a stroke and were ignoring me telling them how much the temperature hurt. Or nurses leaving in clearly wrongly put in venflons with 0 things scheduled for injections, leaving me in pain, unable to use an arm. I developed a severe phobia of venflons thanks to this. :/

  • Jay@lemmy.ca
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    A bit hard to explain, but I had an accident once that screwed up my wrist. If you look at your wrist, there’s a bone that sticks out forming a little lump. underneath it is another round bone called the perilunate. My perilunate got dislodged and ended up pinching off the nerves to my fingers (carpal tunnel) and essentially shut down three of my fingers. My wrist was x-rayed and two separate doctors who looked at the x-ray told me everything was fine.

    I asked “Are you sure?” I’m no stranger to pain but something felt totally off there. I was assured everything was ok, and to go to my doctor in a month if things didn’t get better. A month later, I went to another doc because it was not better at all, who took another x-ray and sent me home. I had just gotten home when he phoned me in a panic and told me to head straight back to the hospital for an expert to look at. He was in total disbelief that both doctors didn’t notice. I had surgery and three steel pins put into my wrist the next morning to hold things in place. Here’s the x-ray with a rather noticable bone out of place. https://i.imgur.com/n2rHYuw.jpg and after the pins were put in to hold things in place while it healed. https://i.imgur.com/Cnh0QwK.jpg

    TLDR: I ran around for a month with a bone on the wrong side of my wrist because two doctors were in a hurry.

      • Jay@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        Although I was a bit annoyed at them I can’t really blame them. People screw up sometimes, it just sucked it had to be on me lol! I will never have full range use of my right hand anymore but I’m not sure how much was due to them overlooking things vs how much is because of the accident itself.

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      Why in god’s name do they think they can diagnose nerve issues with x-rays??

      It makes no sense.

      To be clear I am not disbelieving you. I have plenty of experience with doctors trying to use x-rays to diagnose soft tissue problems. It’s so fucking stupid it makes me want to rip my hair out.

  • blackstampede@sh.itjust.works
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    Went to a doctor for a twisted ankle, who told me that my feet had exaggerated arches. When asked what that meant (as in- medically, what problems could that cause) he laughed and replied that it meant I had “ugly fucking feet”.

  • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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    That time in the year 2000 I had gotten extremely ill and I had never felt such peculiar horrific illness in my life, it was like a flu but worse and weirder and I felt like I was going to die because I couldn’t eat I couldn’t stand up, (I’m normally an extremely healthy active person), this went on for a couple weeks and I lived alone which made it impossible to see a doctor because I couldn’t drive myself in that condition,

    but thankfully I had a spiritually intuitive friend who had a feeling she should call me and thankfully she did and she arranged for one of her friends to drive me to the hospital.

    So I saw my primary care physician and he was very dismissive of me. When he came into the room he saw me laying on the crackly paper bed and he insultingly thought I was faking sick and trying to get out of work, and told me to sit up. He mockingly said “oh you’re not feeeeling well?” He troubled himself to run a throat culture on me then sent me home. I was not feeling well enough to go back home and die alone.

    The next day my same friend arranged to come pick me up and take me to the emergency room where they admitted me into the hospital.

    I was hospitalized for 2 weeks apparently I had cytomegalovirus, and they ran all kinds of tests on me including general anesthesia for throat probe down to my intestines, an eye exam for some reason, but mostly those two weeks were a complete blur to me, I mostly slept all the time.

    The husband and son of my friend came to pick me up from the hospital when it was all over, and I was recuperating at home for another week before returning to work, when I got a phone call from my original primary care physician and he said “You know what, your throat culture came back looking a little unusual.”

    I’m like

    “No shit! I was just hospitalized nearly dead for 2 weeks. Now you’re calling me a month later telling me my throat culture was slightly abnormal? If I’d waited here all that time for your phone call, I wouldn’t have answered the phone because I would’ve been dead. Thanks for nothing.”

    I didn’t actually say all those things to them, we don’t think of how to respond to such things until years later.

    • 𝕃𝕒𝕞𝕓@lemmy.zipOP
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      1 year ago

      I’m so sorry. Bless the person who saved your life. And bless doctors and nurses who treat patients well. A faking patient will show up on tests. A denied non-true patient may die or suffer life-long consequences. There is 0 reason to deny people medical care.

    • stolid_agnostic@lemmy.ml
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      If it helps, the doctor had actually reviewed your entire chart before calling you. He already knew he was an idiot, but whether he had the emotional maturity to understand it is a different question.

  • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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    That time in 2006 I had a really good OBGYN that was seeing me through from the beginning of my pregnancy all the way to my childbirth, but somewhere along the way at one of my visits he said there was a visiting doctor on the floor who wanted to examine me and asked for my permission and consent and I’m like

    sure whatever, why wouldn’t I trust a doctor? If he needs to do something and learn something for his professional credentials, sure, go ahead whatever you need to do. I didn’t say all those words, but that was the gist of the exchange.

    Then for some reason my doctor and the nurse chaperone left the room(?!) so it was just that visiting Dr and me in the room and he got creepy wanting to touch my cervix and he looked me in the eye while he did it and it was just a creepy vibe, and I could tell he was being a perv about it.

    Extremely unprofessional.

    and it’s not like I was even sexy. A wild jungle of pubic hairs, fat, there was nothing sexy about me, he was just a sick twisted doctor

    and I wonder whatever became of him. I never saw him before or since and I never got around to reporting the incident because it took a while for my brain to comprehend that what he did was not appropriate, and I had a million other things going on in my life, this was just a weird thing that happened that got lost in the jumble of all the other life events.

    It happened at Trinity Health Hospital in Minot North Dakota.