Being able to just simply move on from something as easily.
Not a common ability but some people have photographic memory.
I can’t remember shit. Photographic memory would be life changing.
As someone with ADHD. My brain remembering things would be a game changer.
Afaik no one has ever been proven to have photographic memory (e.g. being able to remember random dots on an image is used as a test, if memory serves right). So for the most part it is just a nice little character trait for movies and the likes.
I noticed that a lot of people I know are significantly better at remembering some things, in this case numbers, but worse at other parts (e.g. conversations). So oftentimes its also a matter of what exactly you are good and bad at remembering.
Depending on the context, it also comes with experience. Think of games like chess, poker, etc. Experienced players are often able to replay an entire match, which in large part comes from their experience and the context of the many games they’ve played. If you met the same people in their first few matches, that ability would probably have been a lot less developed (if that makes sense).
No scientific backing on these statements, it’s just based on my personal experience and impressions.
Maintain eye contact.
Shit makes me so uncomfortable. Look at me all you want, that’s fine. I’m going to look at that plant.
If you want to look at that plant, I’ll look at you, but you can’t have both.
Unless we both look at the plant. That’s fine too.
Out of curiosity, how does it feel for you to look at someone’s nose while they are looking in your eyes?
i want to be able to make easy fun conversation
Sleep instantly and without interruption
Having the ability to see images in my mind. Sounds like a cool ability, not sure if it would be a curse though.
Sounds like you have aphantasia. Wish more research was done on it, I only learned about it when I was randomly talking with my friends and one of them said they couldn’t imagine an image.
I’m stuck with the ability to imagine complete scenes but not be able to draw what I imagine haha
I totally hate aphantasia.
One time I did mushrooms and thought about an apple and I kinda saw it and was amazed. I’ve never been able to do it again though
I was in hospital earlier in the year for surgery, they gave me ketamine afterwards…started seeing shit.
It was weird.
Hated it for the dissociative effect; but the seeing shit for a few hours after was strange, but ok.
To do things at the proper time, and not procrastinate.
I truly don’t know how some people work if not in a manic state for 10 hrs straight because you have a bunch of stuff due at the same time
I guess I could spread out the work, but sometimes I’m passively thinking of the best way to tackle it and other times it’s a task I don’t like doing.
Executive functioning.
Went here to say that. Imagine not having an absolute obsession, want to do the thing, but not thinking about it all day. You just… do it. Couldn’t be me. I wish I could have little side projects instead of just… comtemplating the idea of doing it for fucking years.
Pretending to give a shit when I don’t
It’s literally how I make all my money.
Teach me your secrets!
Which half are you having trouble with? The apathy, or the pretense?
The pretense. I do not have a good poker face.
You don’t want a poker face! You want to be very expressive. But voice is even more important. Pitch voice soft and a little low, and always decreasing at the end of a sentence, the opposite of asking a question. Like a kind parent talking to a tired toddler or particularly stupid dog.
You’re trying to slip information into the person at a subconscious level, and the information you want to slip in is that you, the speaker, are trustworthy and will take care of them. It’s much easier to do this than to actually figure out and fix whatever bullshit problem they’ve created for themselves.
Note that this is not effective on people you see everyday, as they will eventually realize you didn’t do anything to actually help them. But for one-offs, work associates-of-associates, clients you’re not the sole contact for, and the more distant sort of relative, it works pretty well.
That’s pretty hilarious and I don’t doubt it’s efficacy!
I’ll admit my trouble with these situations is I can’t help but care about people or fixing things, often to save them from themselves as if they’re, like you said, toddlers.
I start to resent being taken advantage of though. It’s tough. :(
So you’re also struggling with the apathy part, huh? For me, waiting tables, I just don’t think of the guests as fully human. They come in hungry and I make sure they leave happy. Giving them a sense of assurance is a part of that, but as soon as they’re out the door they cease to exist.
As to resentment, you shouldn’t be resentful of something you choose to do, or to put it another way, you shouldn’t choose things to do that harm your own well-being.
It takes too much energy to have a good poker face, I’d rather just stay grumpy.
Don’t compare your blooper reel with other people’s highlights.
Also, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie split up about twenty years ago and that relationship is still creating drama
Do you mean Pitt and Jennifer Aniston? The Brangelina split was in 2019.
My favorite Jolie story.
Lauren Ridloff is deaf. She was having problems with her cues in ‘The Eternals.’ Jolie told the director to use a laser pointer and then clean it up in post-production.
Also, they had to use her own kid in Maleficent because she was scaring all the other children.
I wish I could actually listen to what is being said to me for more than 5 minutes. Instead of having my attention drift off and me starting to daydream about something the other said.
I wish I could have a baseline functional understanding of human interaction & relationships.
As someone who transitioned from a deeply introverted anxious young adult with a persistent stammer, to a relatively outgoing person who is capable of clear communication, the secret is caring less and forgetting that you exist.
There are steps though to get there:
- Look at a person. De-age them back to when they were a shy or excited or inquisite toddler. That’s their base model. Anything built on that is just extra wisdom or fluff or bluster.
- Talk to people like you would an innocent child, just use more grownup words.
- Cheat questions:
- “How was your day today” “what did you get up to” “hows your upcoming week looking”
- Cheat responses:
- “nice!” “well done!” “oh damn”
- Cheat moves:
- Eye contact. Look at people in the eye, then look away when describing something, then look them in the eye again.
- Nodding: Make nodding gestures as they respond to you
- Hands: Gesture with your hands when you describe something.
- Smile: You don’t need to smile, but it helps. You can look away when you do it.
- Listening helps but is top-tier and isn’t a requirement
- Learn to build connections through topics though. If they’re talking about cats, remember your dog.
- Signal it’s your turn: I suck at this and wait for gaps, which usually means I forget what I wanted to say, but you can signal in other ways
- Yes: Finger gun and a nod whilst inhaling
- No: Polite laugh and a head shake whilst exhaling
- Random: if someone won’t stop, they need to be stopped. Just jump in with your crab story, who cares.
This should hopefully get you along the way to forgetting that you exist in a conversation, and it should become second nature after a while.
To be consistent on a physical level.
I play guitar and games like rocket league, things that require excellent physical dexterity, and consistency is a big factor. I struggle to repeat physical actions the same way every time. I practice lots, and I’m reasonably good at both things (imho), but I know I screw up more than most people because I can’t repeat things the same way every time.
That’s absolutely normal, especially as people tend to compare their general performance with their peak performance („I managed to play that without errors once, why am I not managing it every time?“).
You can do a number of things to improve your mental consistency within the limits of your current abilities by forming healthy habits around it, if it is very important. E.g. a balanced lifestyle of sorts and a good warmup routine when playing your instrument, but even then you will have off days.
If you want to nail that section consistently, you will have to increase your skill ceiling quite a bit, way beyond „nailing it once“. Usually you don’t notice that progress as much with instruments, because ideally the things you are working on are always challenging you at your current level, but try going back to something you played one or two years ago. You may have to refresh the piece until it sounds good again, but then you will probably be way more consistent about your performance than the first time around.
Rocket league is a completely different skill set, but the concepts apply in the same way. Structuring your life around being in ideal mental and physical condition to perform in a video game is probably a lot less useful for your life, but I’d bet every professional player does it.
I wish it didn’t take me so long to understand things that other people seem to get easily.
I wish I could bang ass for longer than a minute :/
Try concentrating on your breathing.
I wish I could form intimate relationships.
