Not sure. I’ve never really reflected on that idea. It certainly seems to be true for me personally.
My alcoholic years had some pretty ugly parts and could have killed me several times. Severe depression, self harm, suicidal thoughts, wrecked my car (thankful it was just me and a steep curb, no one else involved, that could have been so much worse), a hospital trip, walking 2 miles home by myself at 3am almost every weekend while hammered in the middle of a US city known for its crime and lowkey wanting someone to try to mug me, etc. Let alone the physical damage that 50-100+ standard drinks per week at my worst was doing to my body, luckily none of that seems to be permanent, I was scared to get my blood work done for the first year alcohol free, but it came back fine.
I don’t like looking back on that period of my life, but I’ve come to terms with the fact that it happened and I can’t change that and mostly been able to forgive myself.
So while it was ugly and could have killed me, shit at parts of it I wanted it to kill me, at the same time… I wouldn’t be who I am today without all that (and a lot of therapy and self reflection and journaling and all that fun stuff). I really genuinely like who I am today. I haven’t been able to say that for the majority of my life. And I find a lot more appreciation in the little things that I used to be too numb to see. I’m doing things I enjoy solely because I enjoy them, not because my family or parts of society say it’s what I’m supposed to be doing.
I don’t think I want that statement to be true for humanity as a whole, at least not in the way that I faced my mortality, I hope there are other ways people can get to a point where they feel truly alive. But yea I think it’s true for me.
What do you think about the idea that people need to actually realize their mortality before being able to really live?
Not sure. I’ve never really reflected on that idea. It certainly seems to be true for me personally.
My alcoholic years had some pretty ugly parts and could have killed me several times. Severe depression, self harm, suicidal thoughts, wrecked my car (thankful it was just me and a steep curb, no one else involved, that could have been so much worse), a hospital trip, walking 2 miles home by myself at 3am almost every weekend while hammered in the middle of a US city known for its crime and lowkey wanting someone to try to mug me, etc. Let alone the physical damage that 50-100+ standard drinks per week at my worst was doing to my body, luckily none of that seems to be permanent, I was scared to get my blood work done for the first year alcohol free, but it came back fine.
I don’t like looking back on that period of my life, but I’ve come to terms with the fact that it happened and I can’t change that and mostly been able to forgive myself.
So while it was ugly and could have killed me, shit at parts of it I wanted it to kill me, at the same time… I wouldn’t be who I am today without all that (and a lot of therapy and self reflection and journaling and all that fun stuff). I really genuinely like who I am today. I haven’t been able to say that for the majority of my life. And I find a lot more appreciation in the little things that I used to be too numb to see. I’m doing things I enjoy solely because I enjoy them, not because my family or parts of society say it’s what I’m supposed to be doing.
I don’t think I want that statement to be true for humanity as a whole, at least not in the way that I faced my mortality, I hope there are other ways people can get to a point where they feel truly alive. But yea I think it’s true for me.