• kautau@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    When you have to give him remote access to install the new endpoint injection protection

  • rumba@lemmy.zip
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    2 days ago

    Yeah, that’s me. Patrike Swayzee virtually wrapping my flabby arms around your two sizes too small discount fabric office wheelie chair with a leaky piston. Our mutual guts not even getting in the way because of the wonders of virtual scream manipulation.

    I don’t even brush the encrusted dead skin cells off your keys down into your Dorito/Cheeto dust filled keyboard as I quietly close page after page of WebMD, Reddit, Facebook, and Twitter to get the CPU to a baseline so I can find out what’s causing high utilization. Hint: it’s probably that “free poker” application you downloaded on Friday that’s trying to do a combination of Bitcoin mining and key logging, or maybe that free “AI chat friend” that wants nothing but your well-being and for some “unknown” reason, the last four of your social security number.

    Rest assured, at the end of the call, I will tell you once again not to download stupid non-work related crap, and assure you that I can’t see your screen (nor whould I want to) at any point during the day without the little badge popping up in the lower right hand corner saying I’m looking at your screen. I mean, it’s a lie I totally could for sure make your box send me a screenshot but that is literally the last thing I would want to see in a day here.

    It’s just a modern day love story…

      • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 days ago

        Do it with men as they use the urinals. Make sure to give them a gentle smooch on the cheek while you do. Just to be friendly.

  • Mothra@mander.xyz
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    3 days ago

    Okay so I know not to ask any Patricks or ghosts to do pottery with me from behind. Hate when someone else controls my desktop remotely

    • valkyre09@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      As somebody who works in service desk, we love it when the users let us work away. Don’t go too far though, I might need you on standby to enter your creds

      • Pringles@sopuli.xyz
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        3 days ago

        I don’t do support like that anymore, but I hated users dropping off their laptop and stating they would be back after their one hour meeting only for you to need their credentials within 2 minutes and the person not showing back up for several hours, to then complain it’s not fixed. And no, I refused to reset their password without consent. Usually they wouldn’t even give you the time to ask for that.

    • Sockenklaus@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      Ugh… There’s this sales / tech guy for this atrocious software I have to use. Everytime I have an issue and report it to him, he’s like “Oh, give me remote access and let me see if I can fix it right away.”

      Dude… You have full access to my terminal server and in general the issues I report are not specific to my user account. So please let me work and do your thing without bothering me. When you have a lead and need my input please report back to me.

      • rumba@lemmy.zip
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        2 days ago

        But the more obtrusive his support is the harder you work to sort out your own problems.

        And if he doesn’t log at least 6 hours worth of work, there’s either going to be every structure or maybe they’ll offshore his support.