prettybunnys

there is absolutely NOTHING innocent about a kitten. Much less an orange one …

I think you’ve discharged all you can

Her sitting on the toilet is probably a really good bracing stance so the amount of toilet water you can force through your socks will be much higher.

This is smart.

Well they’re dumbasses then, because it’s using baseball as the metaphor.

One side pitches the ball to the other. Ball goes in glove.

It’s silly because pitching and catching are older terms for top and bottom.

Like 0 rights.

I’ll give you my solidly blue, pretends to be progressive states take:

If you are the father of the child you are responsible for the child. Unless you are married to the mother of the child, you default to having 0 legal custody of that child and all matters of the child’s health and welfare are up to the mother to decide. You have no paternal rights to the child, but you do have paternal obligations.

If you marry the mother you are suddenly legally part of the equation and have more rights, but unless you’re married to the mother of your child you have no legal standing.

This morning after taking my morning constitutional I realized how much this shitpost community was part of my life.

I had corn for dinner.

pitcher/catcher gets used a lot but also makes me giggle because I’m immature

What’s the difference between jelly and jam?

this is actually a setup for a dirty joke

. . . Speak for yourself

That’s how it would work in the USA too, especially if you’re brown.

Felony murder is bullshit

My first pair the pads over the “speaker” bit fell off after time.

Granted I had thoroughly drenched them in sweat and other random outdoor gunk for nearly 2 years before they did.

My second pair doesn’t have the pads and have been holding up well. No issues on my end but I would wager the battery will fail in time.

Soooo 0 for 1 then so far

I still intend to get sleep, I just am going to stop fighting the battle of waking up at a certain time and waiting for an acceptable time.

If anything this means I’m gonna be training to hibernate rather than becoming an insomniac.

Looks like a simile to me

I’m really looking forward to shirking the notion of night and day.

When my kid leaves the house it’s gonna get so so so weird up in here.

Diarrhea cha cha cha

Adults also shouldn’t talk to po-lice

I’m gonna use it wrongteously

Dobby has cookies in his cookie pouch, come grab one