Lilith, a witch that lives in fast-paced New York, is also a passionate pumpkin carver. To harvest the best crop of mugwort she knows, she returns home to the town of Spooksville. As the autumn leaves turn, she meets Jake, the town’s charming ghost tour guide, at the annual Haunted House contest. He helps her harvest the mugwort and she helps him remove a curse put on him by a crazy ex-GF. She decides to stay through Halloween to see the pumpkin carving competition. As they navigate spooky pranks and unexpected feelings, they uncover a magical pumpkin that grants wishes— and Lilith wishes that Jake would love her, but the pumpkin says “I cannot grant a wish that is already fulfilled!” It turns out the ex-GF curse was to harden his heart, so all he did was be terminally online posting AI slop on Twitter. They kiss and go make like 32 babies in some cracker-ass podunk town and listen to country music and whatever else is at the end of a Hallmark movie.
Love it. That second sentence needs a record scratch and switch to a higher tempo track. Make Rob Schneider a talking pumpkin and you’ve got yourself a winner!
Let’s make it a trio of celebrity voices as 3 magic pumpkins that have to agree on a wish to grant it: Rob Schneider, Hugh Grant, and Reese Witherspoon. Maybe Queen Latifah, if that counts as “diversity.”
Record scratch is that she needs 100% organic mugwort grown on a south-facing slope in well-draining soil. First small twist- turns out the perfect crop she needs is on Jake’s back 40 and he finds her plucking mugwort leaves while driving around on a tractor harvesting his own sweaty abs in an open sleeveless orange and black snap-up plaid cowboy shirt.
Really, someone give me $1 million and I can get this done!
Yeah, good idea to pad the budget like that! My friend has a tractor we could use for free. Let’s get this one in the can and spend the remaining $990,000 on taking the witches to Playa del Carmen, a known gathering spot for inter-coven discussions.
100% Agree. OK, here’s my pitch, Netflix:
Lilith, a witch that lives in fast-paced New York, is also a passionate pumpkin carver. To harvest the best crop of mugwort she knows, she returns home to the town of Spooksville. As the autumn leaves turn, she meets Jake, the town’s charming ghost tour guide, at the annual Haunted House contest. He helps her harvest the mugwort and she helps him remove a curse put on him by a crazy ex-GF. She decides to stay through Halloween to see the pumpkin carving competition. As they navigate spooky pranks and unexpected feelings, they uncover a magical pumpkin that grants wishes— and Lilith wishes that Jake would love her, but the pumpkin says “I cannot grant a wish that is already fulfilled!” It turns out the ex-GF curse was to harden his heart, so all he did was be terminally online posting AI slop on Twitter. They kiss and go make like 32 babies in some cracker-ass podunk town and listen to country music and whatever else is at the end of a Hallmark movie.
Love it. That second sentence needs a record scratch and switch to a higher tempo track. Make Rob Schneider a talking pumpkin and you’ve got yourself a winner!
Let’s make it a trio of celebrity voices as 3 magic pumpkins that have to agree on a wish to grant it: Rob Schneider, Hugh Grant, and Reese Witherspoon. Maybe Queen Latifah, if that counts as “diversity.”
Record scratch is that she needs 100% organic mugwort grown on a south-facing slope in well-draining soil. First small twist- turns out the perfect crop she needs is on Jake’s back 40 and he finds her plucking mugwort leaves while driving around on a tractor harvesting his own sweaty abs in an open sleeveless orange and black snap-up plaid cowboy shirt.
Really, someone give me $1 million and I can get this done!
Yeah, good idea to pad the budget like that! My friend has a tractor we could use for free. Let’s get this one in the can and spend the remaining $990,000 on taking the witches to Playa del Carmen, a known gathering spot for inter-coven discussions.
We’re going to have a spooky bonfire! And drink potions! Thebonfireisonthebeachandthepotionsaremargaritas
As the token male, I will just be hanging around the pool eye-banging hunks. Just text me when it’s time to do the thing with the bees!