• confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    6 hours ago

    I had a friend call me one night because she said no to a guy and he started threatening to kill himself. Like damn. That’s some insane guilt-tripping, manipulative bullshit right out the gate. And this wasn’t the first time this happened to her too.

    • Deceptichum@quokk.au
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      2 hours ago

      That reminds me of one of my ex’s, she did far worse things but that shit still fucked with my head a lot too.

    • Maeve@kbin.earth
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      6 hours ago

      It’s happened to me. I called his friend and they came and collected him and his stuff.

      • Waldelfe@feddit.org
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        5 hours ago

        In my experience as a bi-woman, no. There are equally as many emotionally manipulative men and women. For men it often takes the form of “If you don’t do this physical thing (kiss, sex etc), you don’t like me.” or “If you ask for this security measure (meeting at a public place, using condomes), you don’t really like me.”

      • cynar@lemmy.world
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        5 hours ago

        A small group of idiots can do a disproportionate amount of damage. These men can’t get and keep a lady, so go on a disproportionate number of first dates.

        It’s the same with the inverse, “bunny boilers”. Far more men have been on the receiving end than most women expect. For women it’s even more extreme. It takes a woman a while to build to that emotional state. The male equivalent can go bang after just a few messages, or a single date.

          • Serinus@lemmy.world
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            3 hours ago

            I mean, they started with “a few of”.

            For those who didn’t know,

            (AI)
            A “bunny boiler” is a slang term for a dangerously obsessive, vengeful person (usually a woman) spurned by a lover, originating from the iconic 1987 film Fatal Attraction, where Glenn Close’s character boils a pet rabbit to terrorize her ex-lover’s family. The term describes an unstable individual prone to extreme, often violent, emotional outbursts after rejection, becoming a cultural shorthand for such behavior.

            • Deceptichum@quokk.au
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              2 hours ago

              And this shit?

              The male equivalent can go bang after just a few messages, or a single date.

        • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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          4 hours ago

          That’s only if you need women that badly, or men, or anything.

          I just need my fellow male co-workers to stop being toxic, or threatening to do things to me.

          I need my male friends to stop tearing me down too (taken care of, went no contact).

          I got decent friends, but I’m stuck with certain crude co-workers who display disgusting behavior (like insisting I grab my female co-worker by the pussy, and so on).

          EDIT: If it was not obvious, most of my disgruntment (and distrust for women by extension) is actually due to awful treatment from male friends. So if I could date at all, I would rather not, or would rather put it off, because I don’t want to get burned by women too. The lesson I guess, is that most of men’s suffering is actually from other men.

    • baines@lemmy.cafe
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      5 hours ago

      don’t be a doormat, proper response is ‘ok’

      *edit for clarity, I’m talking about the guy threatening to kill himself, she needs to hard cutoff that guy

      • confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        6 hours ago

        She called someone who she trusts in a time when she needed support. I made sure she was safe, calm and around people she felt safe being around for the rest of the night.

        Before that night, we became our own little mental health support group so of course I’m going to make sure she feels safe after dealing with some unhinged shit like how that guy was acting.

        Also she lives in a different country, her life is her own as much as my life is my own in my own country. It’s possible for two people to be friends, care for each other and not expect to be in an intimate or romantic relationship with each other.

          • confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            5 hours ago

            Aaah sorry, I thought the earlier comment initially came off as dismissive towards my friend. All good.

            I don’t recall what my friend said but dude got kicked out of the glow-in-the-dark mini golf place and she got to have his drink for free before finding her safe friends again. Problem solved itself fortunately.