“The whole time you were trying to kill us” And just like that, they’re back to trying to kill you. But it’s a very cute sneeze, and it’s hard not to get killed when someone sneezes like that :3c

Same, but the other way around? I want a soundproof room to be quiet in and to escape from this noisy world.

tfw the lights suddenly turn off and you aren’t sure if it’s Amazon or demons (what’s the difference, anyway)

If your bathroom is at the end of a dark hallway, there are various solutions to your problem:

1. More light switches: You can add another light switch next to your bedroom door. This can be done either by tearing open the wall and putting in new wiring, by placing wires on the wall (if you don’t want to or can’t tear open the wall, e.g. along the bottom of the wall), or by replacing the old light switch with one that can be remotely operated via a remote or an app.

2. A torch that you keep at 15% battery at all times: Torches (or flashlights) have this creepy flair that ceiling lights can’t match. Spice it up a bit more by keeping the battery barely charged. That way, it might turn off while you’re on the toilet and you’ll have to run back to your bedroom. The thrill of that is unmatched.

3. Piss bottle

4. Install a toilet in your bedroom: Who wouldn’t like to sleep right next to where they poop? This is a convenient way to avoid leaving your bedroom altogether, and you won’t have to tear open the walls like you would have for extra light switches (what’s plumbing?).

5. Lose all hope and give up on life: If you don’t care whether you live or die, the monsters in the dark become way less scary!

(I promise I’m not an AI)

The best part about these art fights is that people do them for fun. I guess they also give you some publicity, but the artworks themselves are made not because they’re commissioned but because people like doing art, and I think that’s beautiful.

Step 3 is too real. I spend so many of my rest periods between sets looking like this little guy. A few months ago, I was doing a set, tried not to cry while resting, then did the next set as if nothing was wrong.

If all vampires were that cute, they’d have a much easier time finding people who’d willingly let them drink their blood <3

“Praise our prophet ^{who’s also a sub}”

“What did you just call me?”

“PRAISE BE”

What the heck, if that’s the uniform, I’m gonna go join the army real quick, brb

Edit: Don’t let them fool you, this is not an authentic army uniform and they don’t have cute anthro soldiers either! Anyway, my plane to Iraq is about to depart, so I’ve gotta go.

Please, someone just collar me and I’ll be your obedient little pet*

*You’ll also have to take care of me, feed me, pay my bills etc. because pets don’t have jobs UwU

And so much of it is garbage I don’t need in the first place. I wish shops worked like in video games and you could just sell whatever to them. Even if they don’t pay well, if I could get rid of stuff I don’t need and knew that someone else would get to use it, I’d bring them all the stuff I thought I’d like but didn’t. But no, you either have to sell it / give it away yourself (too much effort), throw it away (what a waste), or sell it to second-hand stores that’ll only take a handful of items from you because the rest doesn’t meet their expectations (I tried to sell books once, but those stores won’t buy certain titles at all).

Some days are just not meant for gaming, I think. It sucks, but sometimes, I really want to play a game, and the second I start, it just annoys me. The smallest setback is enough to make me ragequit (more like sadquit, I guess) when that happens. It doesn’t matter what game it is, either. Minecraft, Celeste, ETS2, whatever it is, it won’t bring me any pleasure on those days :c

They look a bit skeptical. Maybe they don’t like the taste? If they don’t like it, I’ll be happy to eat it ^w^

No, don’t apologise. I already fell in love with you <3

Mmh, I wish I had a twink to stuff. Or someone to stuff me~ (although I don’t think I fit the definition of twink any more)

#5BCEFA at 26,9

There’s almost a 69 in those coordinates! :3c

I was wondering where you went! I figured you needed a break, but you were busy dealing with the consequences of the actions of a man who will never have to deal with the consequences of his own actions. I’m sorry to hear that. It’s good to see you again, and I hope you at least get to take some extra time off to relax and wind down after so much hard work.

I’d just jump straight into lava if that happened (in Minecraft)

I hate that I thought sludgebitch was gonna say that they could now fuck their own mum again.

I’m trying to find a part-time job for that exact reason, but it’s really tough to find one. I mean, it’s tough to find a job in general at the moment, but the part-time requirement makes it even tougher. And like the other person said, it’s always a compromise between time and money, and not everybody can make such a compromise because they genuinely need a full-time salary.