E: Da Rules

  • The teleportation can only be used to move you.

  • Your clothes and basic personal items (the things you take with you everytime you leave the house) will teleport with you, but nothing else.

  • Dizzy Devil Ducky@lemm.ee
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    5 hours ago

    If it allowed me to teleport between dimensions as well, definitely moving to that one parallel Earth where everything is peaceful, prices are cheap, and everything is seemingly perfect (except for the lottery system where a small group of people die if they win in a population control sort of scheme). Don’t take a lot of money and your odds of being picked are low.

    Though, if it only worked for this world, probably just use it once to get to the kitchen faster at a random time because I can’t use it to get to college because of my class schedule. That, and I’m pretty sure my parents would find it suspicious if I suddenly teleported to a store and called either needing a ride or they cannot find me, especially if I don’t give them a heads up.

  • Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone
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    7 hours ago

    I guess to work. It takes me 2 days of travelling to get to work and I have to be there. Assuming I can’t return via teleporting from the moon or whatever. Just save myself a days travel

  • djsoren19@yiffit.net
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    14 hours ago

    What’s the nearest planet with an Earth-like atmosphere? Any particular star clusters that have a higher likelihood of harboring a civilization? If I can go anywhere, I’m taking a gamble and trying to find aliens. Even if I fail to find intelligent life, I’m already at a point where struggling to survive on an alien planet sounds better.

  • Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world
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    19 hours ago

    Right next to Vladimir Putin. Only wish I carried a gun or knife or something but we’re about to find out if an obese middle aged man can strangle to death an elderly Russian. Actually, let’s make it interesting, drop me maybe 10-15 ft above his head.

    I know there are probably better things or at least less suicidal things i could do but it’s a chance to give my life meaning and the best I could think of.

    • perestroika@lemm.ee
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      15 hours ago

      Actually, let’s make it interesting, drop me maybe 10-15 ft above his head.

      I would predict success, martyrdom (75% chance) and impressive headlines. :D

      If you could convince his bodyguards that the main computer of an alien spaceship sent you as a sick joke to prevent nuclear war, they might spare you for bargaining. Whether you’d be spared long enough for revolution to happen and get home - not sure.

      As a practising anarchist, I would also volunteer, my everyday items even include several cans of pepper spray, a multitool and a heavy laptop with a detachable battery (to commit some battery).

  • CheeseNoodle@lemmy.world
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    21 hours ago

    So the ISS would probably be the coolest place I could go to but first I’d open up a GPS app on my phone and also set the camera recording so that it could potentially gather interesting data about the teleportation.

  • cynar@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    The International Space Station. The sheer confusion value would be amazing, particularly if I stayed quiet about how it happened (“I went to bed, then woke up floating here. I’ve no clue how it happened”).

    I would get to cause a major incident of complete chaos, with little to no harm. I would get to experience space and weightlessness. I would also get a near guaranteed lift home (eventually). There’s also almost no way it could be kept quiet, so I get to be a minor celebrity for a while.

    • brrt@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      with little to no harm

      Not sure how resource allocation works and how quickly you could be sent back to earth but someone may have to be sacrificed.

      • mipadaitu@lemmy.world
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        4 hours ago

        There’s always an excess of resources, just in case of spacecraft failure.

        There are actually already extra crew up there from the recent Boeing failure.

        SpaceX would definitely benefit from having to come get you, since they’re the only launch company with a good track record, and spare capacity. (Unless you’re Russian, which means you’d probably be shot and stuffed in the garbage section of Soyuz)

      • cynar@lemmy.world
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        23 hours ago

        Compared to telefragging someone on live tv? Also, on the balance, the media coverage would likely help knock loose some more funding for NASA, if only to try and figure out what the f*** happened.

      • lud@lemm.ee
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        21 hours ago

        There are always escape capsules onboard so they could probably just set them down to earth if that happens.

        I would be more worried about something that is entirely untrained being up there for extended periods of time.

    • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      This has the possible downside of you being dissected for the benefit of science. One human life for the possibility of discovering the ability to teleport? The astronauts/cosmonauts on the ISS would know about you, but you’d never make the news.

      • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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        1 day ago

        “Hey some guy just showed up here and no one knows about it.”

        “Cool, lets put him out the airlock and see if he freezes like in that movie”

      • cynar@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Scientists are not good at keeping secrets, particularly not of this level. Also, the ISS is remarkably public. It would be obvious they were hiding something, at the very least.

        Would I expect to spend some time “volunteering” in a research lab, more than likely. I doubt it would get to dissection level. The risk/cost would be low enough that I would take it.

        • Crashumbc@lemmy.world
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          18 hours ago

          Yeah many of the transmissions to the space station are public. This would go viral before anyone “higher up” could have a chance to squash it.

          • cynar@lemmy.world
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            16 hours ago

            That’s also before accounting for the various ground scientists who would rapidly become aware through the private channels. Someone appearing on the ISS would leak beyond containment before anyone could think to cut phone communications, let alone implement it.