• 123 Posts
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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • For me diary is an emotional outlet to process emotions. So I usually write how do I feel and what caused it.

    I also write medical anomalies that happen in my life that is highly likely that I will forget them.

    e.g. runny nose from hay fever(?)

    I am a person that dosn’t form habits so I write when It strikes me fancy and I don’t feel guilty that I don’t do it everyday.

    Sometimes I write a really oustanding event that is a contender for my TOP 10 days of my life (I have seperate file in my digital diary for them)

    I also have separate files for writing about a topic I am reaserching and thinking about.

    Every quarter I also review last 3 months and set myself theme for the next three months.














  • For blender nvidia gpu is a the best for cycles as it has optiX support.

    If she does ONLY modeling and uses eevee renders without viewport previews then integrated graphics could work.

    If she wants viewport preview then dedicated GPU is a must. IDK how fares AMD gpu in blender as I didn’t have one for years.

    Some gaming laptops with dedicated GPUs need external kernel modules just to work if they even have one.

    My best bet would be to go for old gaming laptop.

    My second best bet would be to go for system76 as they have some gaming laptops


  • There is a concern about accesability and hidden gamer slang.

    First person 3d games can make you motion sick.

    There you would need to learn to control a camera.

    Red is health, Blue is mana, Yellow is for climbing.

    There will be countless stuff that are build upon years of gaming culture.

    Try to start with co-op so someone can guide you.

    Make a post it note on the monitor with button mappings especially if you play on gamepad.


  • Maybe in what they are saying is a kernel of a truth

    sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I made a bunch of assumptions and I have really strong desire to help people, so I have made a mistake.

    I’ve personally studied this personal issue for my entire fucking life

    I would also be outraged if some armchair expert or worse an actual expert spew lies towards me and my situation. Even if I can’t offer a solution at least I can be emphatic towards your suffering and your struggle.

    I can’t really offer you much other than virtual hug or a prayer to a higher power for a better tomorrow. Take care of yourself as it seems that no one else will.


  • Why do people always assume I haven’t?

    I assumed that you have some sort of nerve pain like your friend and it would be unbearable.

    Digestive issues are textbook examples of psychosomatic problems so I am less surprised that they didn’t help you. Maybe in what they are saying is a kernel of a truth but that’s not for me to judge as I have my own life to live and you have yours.

    I have high hopes that therapy will help you.

    Yeah, you do know what you’re talking about when you say “I am totally clueless”. No offense, but spot on.

    I am basically Socrates. And now I don’t know what to do with that lack of knowledge. Maybe I should build a time machine and stroll around in an ancient Greece or study philosophy with my inflated ego. /j


  • I’ve since not been listened to at all,

    Yeah, that sucks.

    I have read some years ago tips for women on reddit how to deal with misygonic docs that don’t take problems seriously. The gist of it was to present a story with your appearence that will help the doc emphatize with you (as I remember that was to present themselfs as business woman where illness prevents them from working.)

    I guess something similar could be used for drug user that somehow is intepreted as addict.

    I am uninformed but I heard from psychiatrist that weed has some negative effects on mental illness.

    I would consider stopping weed for a bit, ride on painkillers(? I am totally clueless) for that time and try to get prescription for weed if it’s possible (wikipedia says that it’s legal for medical use.)


  • tossed out of an ER

    I can relate. That was horrible experience for me and only by intervention of my best friend I am still here.

    finally did manage to get a therapist, […] So that’s one positive thing

    This is HUGE sucess. Congrats! And stick with it for at least couple of months.


    Your mind is playing tricks on you where you toss out a possible solutions outright due to buried emotions.

    There are a lot of different types of reaources and some work and some don’t.

    Different types of Therapy (CBT, EMDR, etc.), group therapy, books and lectures, long hikes, pilgrimages, d&d, meditation, Alcoholics Anonymous, hitting the gym, temp work agency and even more esoteric ones that I don’t reccomend without trying more normal ones. They all are tools that may not work for you but there exists the tool that will work. The difficulty is in finding one that somewhat works and not giving up half way.